Mutual Understanding Demands COMMUNICATION

In relationships, couples must think more of the partnership than they do of themselves. This partnership is an interweaving of interests, and sacrifices will have to be made for the sake of both parties. There must be mutual understanding and concern that security and contentment in relationship will be achieved.

There are no short cuts in building a healthy relationship. No intimate emotional relationship exists between two people for a long time without having some misunderstandings from time to time. Understanding and tolerance are required to overcome feelings of jealousy, anger and suspicion. There must be give-and-take in love…love is learning how and when to sacrifice.

A successful relationship therefore is based on compatibility rather than just only finding the right partner. Both partners must try to be the right person by acting out of mutual respect, love and concern for each other. It must be reminded that there must be no pretensions. Love is an inner feeling and fulfillment arising from the mutual healthy growth with and for the other person.

Lovers build their own dreams and they pursue them together. Dreams are essential for they bind two lovers and make them stronger. In order to build a healthy relationship, a partner must not always try to get things his or her way. There must be only one path to be taken by both, it might be uneven, bumpy and sometimes difficult, but there is always a "mutual path". Mutual understanding therefore is the secret foundation of a relationship. And good communication is the key for mutual understanding.

Everything that happens in a relationship happens through communication. Communication is the very air that a relationship needs to survive. Nothing can happen without it. Everything is possible with it. Communication is the key to any successful relationship. Good communication skills are an essential sign of a mature, self-confident adult. According to S.M. Jourard, author of Self-Disclosure: An Experimental Analysis of the transparent Self, "The better the communication in a relationship, the happier the people are in the relationship. " He stresses that it is almost self-evident that one cannot love. He cannot know the other person unless he has engaged in enough mutual disclosure of self to be able to anticipate needs, wants, and the satisfaction of goals.

A healthy relationship is not one in which we are to exist with our eyes closed. We see faults as well as virtues of our lover, and we should accept the fact that no one is perfect. When we love a person, we do not only project on some angles of his personality; rather we view him as a whole individual accepting both his positive and negative traits. This allows us also to make each other be. My partner, for example, by his love has made me fully myself, not just by being what I am but also by being what I can become when I am with him.

As mentioned earlier, misunderstandings are inevitable in a relationship. Without petty quarrels, relationship is no spice and couples won't grow! Whenever misunderstandings occur, we must learn to be patient, tolerant and understanding. Sometimes we tend to be emotional and hence are liable to get into tantrums, which lead our partner to get angry. In times like this, couples must strive not to be angry at the same time. If both parties are not angry at the same time, problems can easily be resolved by adopting the noble spirit of patience, tolerance and understanding. Older people would say, "Better find a partner with traits opposite to yours…because OPPOSITES attract, and they are most likely make good partners"

Love like life is not always smooth. We experience ups and downs. However, the beauty of love is that we share our happiness with the one we love. And when times get hard, we have someone to share our pain with, someone who shall share the misery that we are in, and to lighten up the load that we carry.